Omiword, I am doing this gig on Friday.

Luckily I wavered a fee in order to toy with the luxury of not being prepared and one hundred percent ‘impromptu’.  I met David Mills with Scott Capuro in Edinburgh and experienced their heady mix of humour when they asked me why I was wearing corrective shoes. I found this funny.

I may venture into experimental psychometric personality testing . Wonder if Jackie Mason's doing that?

http://www.thehospitalclub.com/events/view/24-02-12-dinner-ticket-the-in-crowd-cabaret-with-david-mills

CURRENT AFFAIRS
Last Wednesday I was tending my own computer screen when I got the call. It was from BBC Newsnight. I didn’t pick up. Then I was too tempted so I rang back. Would I come on and talk about how society is sick to its bones with drunk people and could I discuss this with a public heath authority …?

Earlier in the evening I drank 9 diet cokes with two female producers who are taking me to Prague for a big dramatic TV programme that I can’t talk about yet (partly because we haven’t gone yet and there isn’t much to report). I drove to TV centre. Lee from the Blockheads hopped in to act as human sat nav kindly.

This photo was taken in the make up room:

https://twitter.com/#!/The_Blockheads/status/169902111545491456/photo/1

Lee has played music with Gavin’s musician wife. Gavin and Lee had a nice enthusiastic chat while I had my foundation put on and pondered the scare mongering and truthful drunkenness statistics versus unemployment figures and wondered would I in any way make a salient point.

Then I made my debut. Later I got tweeted by a man who observed it was like watching Katie Price. Not in bank balance – but in looks? Certainly. Well observed

So this Friday then, I maybe doing humorous psychometric testing? Coming?
You can get your tea there as well I’m told. 8pm

Cabaret Time

This is the quietest month ever. Even the geek next door is playing his questionable music at a lower pelt. What to do?
Take youth pills, get extra strong coffee, stay on the cross trainer for longer than 15 minutes. (A good sixteen - and I felt ready to tackle the walk to the car).

So having held a clothes sale in house – with a friend who can charge more than me and keep a straight face for a ‘well loved’ pashmina (with bobbles) - I agreed to pop on to that sofa at Breakfast TV to talk about ANOTHER finding from the government about drinking. This time saying two days off is good.
(The message was the same two weeks ago when I went on to say it then – but possibly some people didn’t see me say it .)

Anyway, I do love an early start i.e.  the prospect of sitting close to Charlie Stayt. I make one joke - My doctor asked me ‘Do you drink to excess?’ ‘No,’ I replied. ‘I drink to anything.’ (hilarious for 7.30 am).  This was met with a concerned tweet that I wasn't doing myself any favours. I beg to differ. A small remuneration in these hard times is better than a poke. I apologised to the worried tweeter and thanked her for her interest. Perhaps she’d like to come and see me in this? I’m branching in to psychometric testing as a comedic art form. I’d be glad of her (and your) feed back. Coming?

To book here's a link http://www.thehospitalclub.co.uk/events/view/24-02-12-standard-ticket-the-in-crowd-cabaret-with-david-mills or you can phone 020 7170 9100.

See you there!